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Our close companions for over two decades, who has faced and conquered several hardships, and I respect her for that. However, she has been repeatedly caught off guard by others. Her partner left her, which came as a huge shock. Many of her friends vanished at that point, because they seemed focused solely on her husband. It shocked her deeply. She put in increased attention to be my friend, likely grasped more acutely the essence of true friendship.

Ongoing Issues of Disappearance

Throughout this period, quite a few in her circle have drifted apart and she isn't knowing the cause. Her last employer became hostile, even though she was highly competent, she departed without knowing why things shifted.

How Things Stand Now

Recently, both of us left the workforce so we're spending each other more, but I am finding my position in the relationship is as the audience. I introduce discussion points only for her to redirect the talk toward what interests her. Regarding political views, she expresses firm beliefs. My effort is to suggest verifying facts and alternate views.

She has been organizing a trip abroad I have traveled to many times and lived in for some time. My intention was to offer personal experiences, but this was unappreciated. She really only wanted my agreement with her decisions. I've just come back from a month in that place she is eager to meet, yet I'm reluctant.

Evaluating the Situation

I don't want to be a friend who cuts and runs abruptly, but I don't think she'll truly understand the impact of her behaviour on my self-esteem. Right now, my state is avoidance mode. What should I do?

Possible Paths

One option is to walk away, but it is not often a smooth outcome we imagine. However, addressing it with the goal of a solution demands strength and willingness on both your parts.

Professional advice indicates applying a practical approach to handling disagreements:

"Initially involves describing how things go in your conversations. This needs to be objective and clear like an unbiased account. Next is to tell the way it leaves you feeling. There should be no argument about this. What you feel belong to you, after all. Step three is to question how you are both can shift the pattern between you."

Consider she too has a point of view, meaning you must to remain ready to acknowledge it. One effective method is telling to the other person:

"Now you talk and I promise to not say anything for half an hour."

It's wildly successful in fostering understanding.

Final Thoughts

She could ignore everything, for those who cling to a deep-seated story: they have a version about themselves they're unable to let go of since their identity relies on it being the only thing familiar to them. This is difficult as there is no thoroughfare here, mere obstacles. Yet she could at first react like this then consider on your words. And even if you don't achieve a fix, you'll have satisfaction from having been honest with her.